the "RETURN" of the billabong girl with alluring eye shadow, beautiful orchid earrings......and this time with bubblegum fragrance!

all set out to sentosa today catching the sun with dear friend Winston Seah, the cool dude with the most adorable 10 year old sister in the world. Busking under the sun is our usual routine, however this time we found that the water near to the edge of the bridge is actually quite clear. I was like WOW, I jumped in straight away as I settled the bags on the soft white sand higher of ground. I swam like nobody's business. The sun was pouring, the sand was therapeutic, the wind was soothing and the conversations? Trashy!!! Heh...not really so...I mean we both are devout and sold out christians, so we talked a lot bout praise songs, God and most fave topic of guys "the right girl"...not going into details so you want to know anything, you have to buy your gossips at $50 a piece ya :)

Mr Winston was rather upset today for a tad short while. It is definitely not because i am leaving for Indonesia tomorrow, but because of confusing friendships circumstances I guess.

Friendship are meant to be beautiful, I mean look at Johnathan and David? They were the coolest of cool. I mean I am sure they have their fair share of tiffs, however something stuck within the pillar of their mind, helping them to know that friends are forever, big picture is there, the rest don't really matter unless it is blown up to unimaginable proportions. Then will receptiveness and understanding come in? How much is invested in the friendship?...well it comes both sides of the party...forgiveness is always ready at hand and acceptance is always ready to jump on after!

Ha ha...went into the billabong shop again to shop for Weichun's birthday present, what excellent smokescreen this idea is. As I went in, the familiar sweet voice greeted me,"Here he comes again!" followed by the most gleaming smile ever...I was totally melted. She was wearing a wooly green top with denim shorts. you see, she is really tanned so her skin brought enoguh purpose to the clothes to make her stand out, a real eye turner. I made conversations as I wanted to hunt that earring down for someone. She was so helpful, she walked over and write me a map of Wisma just to get me to that place. As she was just a few centimetres away from me, then a tinge of bubblegum fragrance just stroked my smelling senses and I was totally knocked out, into a whole euphoria of "teenage crush", and at the end guess what...this return visit earned me a knowledge of her name "Emily" I was so smittened by her and the nature of her. "Oh Emily Emily"

I know I know...ian are you going girl crazy? Not really crazy, just smittened. I don't even know her but I am allowed to have feelings that doesn't jeporadise anything else right? [Serious tone] But guess what? This are all excuses, it is my flesh talking, my flesh always forgets the past lessons that I have been through. However there is a "heavy anchor" God has given me to remind me to be best for Him, not best for someone of bubblegum fragrance. I am shamed and remorseful. Ian will have to boycott the feelings of billabong girl for a long while to engage in my euphoria of touching Jesus. Man fail that much to learn simple truths. I don't want to be someone fake, because there are just too many of them in this lifetime. Actually "friendster" only paints one side of the picture. I am talking about the testimonies which is one of their catching point for the masses to look out for it. Testimonies always paints half truth, if someone writes the truth, be it good or bad, will the person put it up? If it is good, of course! Bad? 90% tells me NO...it won't be shown. To be truthful with a price to pay, I want to and my aim, but will people still be my friend? Something to think...whenever I wander off, the Christ anchor yanks me back!

I am a broken and a failed person but God is working in my life, want to know why? or why I became a Christian? Email me, ianloy@lycos.com.

I would have to say my secret fan is really a secretive one. Have been enjoying her mails and interesting conversations through sharing. She is a cool photographer, professional one okay...I only play play...she serious one! I want to know more about her cause she loves God as much as me...passionate person...God there is one passionate person I know and I pray that you bless her always to have her walk your paths of righteousness always for your name sake! Off to indonesia, will be back to share more on 1st May :P