Tuesday, January 31

things that have to be fulfilled...

listening to a broken down radio playing annie lennox's song on FM95 while relishing the moments i have been through today. A smile that is right smacked into my face "why do you have that kind of smile on your face?" I cannot answer that...it just right to do that if you have been through what I have been through and thought through what I have thought through. I have decided what I have decided, prayed about it as well. Like if it is meant, it'll be right? Well how do we know that for sure unless something is placed in a commitment for that to happen. It is a decision for both to make be it toil or joy...it is to happen and both is responsible for it, going through it not alone but hand in hand, having the principalities of Biblical roots to pave our ways right, it is the pillar.

All is passing but this pillar is still and eternally strong. I am looking to you Lord, for you hold my life book, may this beautiful "foreword" be the very essence of the story that is waiting to be unfolded. It took too long for it to be written, but never late if the author is You. I am looking to You. Help answer some of these questions pls for what is meant to be, is placed by You.

Nice weather...cool and spriteful feeling, just couldn't sleep. This CNY has just took a turn for a better. 2006 is really going to be different for me. I am living the new life since :) woohoo!

28 And Peter answered Him and said, “Lord, if it is You, command me to come to You on the water.”
29 So He said, “Come.” And when Peter had come down out of the boat, he walked on the water to go to Jesus. 30 But when he saw that the wind was boisterous,[a] he was afraid; and beginning to sink he cried out, saying, “Lord, save me!”

Peter did walk on water...the only disciple that did that. When he sink and called for help, Jesus answered in faithfulness. Although unfaithfulness is man's bane to commitment. My commitment is having my faithfulness as my cornerstone. There my commitment will be substantial to all trials and tribulations, there joy is reached. hello...You who ate the bagel :P

Monday, January 30

this is ian in 2006...it is going to be his year and it is all going to be good for the source of goodness comes from Yahweh! Just hanging out with fellow leaders then chomping on yucky noodles introduced by ruan mian mian. Oh gosh, I am never going back to that place...they don't even serve UNAGI but they serve weird collagen noodles. It is okay, look at me. HS made it all better for me, He paved the way for me till I am able to place such joy on my expression :)

Sunday, January 29

strengthening my "secret place"

this chinese new year (cny) eve have been the most boring. Especially the wait between the afternoon to the reunion dinner, argh excruciating i tell you. Then some of my readers will say wah ian, so unspiritual, go pray lah. But of course, but all in it's due time! I don't want to go to Him only when I am bored??? NUts...in my joy i wanna go huggy my Father Yahweh...ooh the intimacy can be felt by writing His almighty name on this forgettable blog.

now come to the first day of cny and i will need to prepare for church cause this is like sometime since a public holiday of cny tradition hit Sunday...or i wonder

You know actually today is the one day I could see the flexin of the spiritual backbones of my peers in church and see how sacrificial can they be in giving up the important hours of the first half of the day to come give worship to the almighty which we ought to be in one union always. Heh...who will I see? Will you be there reader? or were you there?

Met up with my church mates at Ben & Jerry's after a long haul of food intake... seafood to be exact, into the mouth WAH i tell you super duper full...i know that this is not one of the things I am called to be the head and not the tail in and that is eating. Felt like puking man. BUT "chunky monkey" was delightful at Ben & Jerry's. What is more special about that place is that we found to gems God hid from us and was reveal on an instance...Yan Ping and Eileen...wah this two such friendly and hospitable people, what i can say I enjoy the company of these two charming and chirpy young personalites. Hope to know them more, though it seem and felt as if I knew them forever. Of course it felt that way...we live in an eternal time and come from the same eternal God, this sort of feeling should be around! "Deja Vu" Like Rev Kong Hee said " We are spiritual beings mastering a human experience"

i will need to find out more things from what mere believers thought it is not important and hard to do which is to go to the secret place and worship Him. Prayer is like a heavenly conversation putting much of Him to you and you to Him...it compliments and it rubs off. Be holy for He is holy, how you do that? Know Him...communication is key, communication is a calling and what carries you there is the faithfulness. This word faithfulness keep ringing in my head during my secret place encounters with the one true God. Faithfulness...

God does not commit to "Talent"
God commits to "Character"
And the cornerstone of "Character" is "Faithfulness"

i have a faithful God...always You are there...always (^_______^)^

Saturday, January 28

my good brother winston that got into Lasalle SIA - Visual Arts side...HURRAH...God's blessing unfolding in his life!!!

Thursday, January 26

boy! Am I worshipping the one true God that fulfills my destiny according to His will...Lord...you have proved faithful once again to me, which I the mundane habit always forgets :)
the God that birth the arts within me...where i found the word passion for the first time

yesterday i went to Lasalle-SIA with Winston for he had an interview waiting for him likened to a final hurdle that he needs to go through before admitting into his lustre of dreams waiting to be cultivated within the vessel of a God moulded clay called "Winston"

there he was walking into the interview room and I? I was having a conversation with the school administrator about a possible degree course that they could offer me on scholarship for a year starting in July06. This information got me thinking and God given wisdom churning...what is next for me. In three years if i continue to do my TCA studies, I'll get a degree, howeverin another scenario if I continue my studies as part time in TCA and do a degree in Theatre ARts then upgrading to a masters for my theological studies, all this can be done in three years as well.

1) 3 years = degree in Theology
2) 3 years = degree in Theatre Arts (On scholarship) + Masters in Divinity

i am in a fix...what i ave been praying for finally came in this sort of an answer. I hear from people saying that this is not God's answer and I should shut it up immediately or I hear should focus and not go by the wayside to be distracted by such. But do they know my prayer life? Or are they putting their advises on me based on the "ian" they know that backslid 3 years ago? Then what happened to Jesus advise to Peter in Luke 22?

31 And the Lord said,[a] “Simon, Simon! Indeed, Satan has asked for you, that he may sift you as wheat. 32 But I have prayed for you, that your faith should not fail; and when you have returned to Me, strengthen your brethren.”

what this passage is saying that the Lord Jesus heard of the plans of Satan to destroy Peter's life and here Jesus is explaining to Simon Peter that he(the devil) is coming for you, but hey no worries for I have prayed for you. It really seem like his calling was all lost in his denial and back to fishing days [by the way he didn't give up totally on fishing business quoted from historian who studied the gospels closely, cos they can't be just receiving alms from the multitudes, if so they would have much uproar of financial questioning from the Romans and spiritual leaders] I remember Jesus say to him before in Matthew

18 And I also say to you that you are Peter, and on this rock I will build My church, and the gates of Hades shall not prevail against it. 19 And I will give you the keys of the kingdom of heaven, and whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed[a] in heaven.”

God Jesus knows that Peter is to be the head and not the tail, the above and not beneath, He meant success for Peter. So which ever turn that Peter took, it will lead him to where God wants him to be. Can a calling be lost? I think of calling as a view of perhaps a sunrise and you are overlooking it over a fence and you have to tiptoe over to see its beautiful arising, however the the tiptoeing is the part that have to be going on...tiptoeing will be the faith that carries you to do the work to see the beautiful part. "Calling" will always be as sure as the Sun, it matters of whether the faithfulness will be there to capture it.

I said it before and I'll say it again that God does not commit to talent, He commits to character and the cornerstone of character is faithfulness. I am faithful to Him all this while and I am not about to give up. I have been praying about my uncertain future and this comes, i need to think about it seriously and pronto. I am meant for success, the Word says it, I am it. If I am doing whatever that I do in His glory, His glory will carry me there...my calling to Youth Pastorship...there will be reasonings, there will be many eyes and opinions that wil pave my option if i choose this path,

how many will believe in me?
how many will stop placing the shadows of the past and God perspective on me?
how many will see that this will go through as a blessing?
Why they place opinions of a mistake I did when I was a spiritual babe?
I can't do it? Seriously what should I do?
I am praying and the door is shown, if the door is shown, should I pray even more and wait upon Him?
The door is given as my prayer is answered and people ask me to wait and be patient to see what God says? I am dumbfounded. Does God work that way? I don't see that happening in Peter's life...sigh I am meant for success and He will carry me through.

I am called to be the head and not the tail, He'll make me the above and not beneath. The next thing I need to do is to seek out my mentor's advise. My past may be rubbles but i understand in God's way that rubbles are gems for His glory to shine...Lord?

Tuesday, January 17

God dropped an angel to bless the children of Thailand and her name is Carre "Rawks" beautiful isn't she? Beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news... Posted by Picasa
we are together again just praising the Lord! We are travelling to witness to the ends of the earth. Posted by Picasa
Yummy delicacies of Thailand small shop house beside our crammy hotel...the dish on the left is called "Kai Tak Tak" in thai Posted by Picasa
oooh...breakfast in the morning has always been a joy! Beef noodles man, wah thank God YUM YUM Posted by Picasa
we are definitely praying for the generations in Thailand...we are in a buddhist temple somewhere in nongkhai. We pray for a spiritual breakthrough in front of idols man made. Posted by Picasa
City Harvest Service @ Indoor Stadium, joy to see this many people worshipping my God...more is to come! Posted by Picasa
the joys of being misunderstood

a comment from a fellow worker, a call from a relatively good friend questions from youths from other areas were the factors of how ppl like myself can be misunderstood if no proper explanation is given to them. And when there is no proper explanation given, they gossip and the problem worsens...victim? Myself and my principalities laid by God.

All they have is shallow information, they didn't even bother to check why I am doing what I am doing...well fair enough...I really don't care what people think for believe this is the way I can train my young folks to be better leaders of the generation to come. From today onwards I will not explain unless there is a need to, and I will pray that even in my misunderstood situation...joy can still be found, things that are done in the secrecy of Him and me, He honors me and it is evident that it has been this way all this while as my leaders and my interns have given me the trust that I need to move on. Satan now has to grow bigger to take on us but no matter how he just can't the better of the conviction given by HS.

I thank God for allowing me to understand and see the point beyond this sort of a storm. For the next thing I will look out for will be a deliverance of our people and many will know Him. Gossip mongers, watch out! For our tongues are made to praise Him, something positive...if you have something negative that beats others down...try repenting?


Friday, January 6

year 2006...my year...In God's allowance

I am back in TCA with still much of last terms work yet to be done. Hmm...I am really bad at academics but I must try my best, I must. I pray to Him who called me and He really wants to kick my A**!!! I really need to buck up on my studies and get on the track and discipline that will shape and discipline my spiritual man within. Thank you Lord, for I will look forward to the spanking sessions in the secret place :)

this year I have four main resolutions, the rest i will not reveal to my blogger fans [like i have bleah :P]

1) to finish all my papers by due date for this term
2) to live a even more organised life with daily ritual with my calendar
3) to read five books daily to improve my depth of knowledge
4) find a good wife :)

Yuppers and this is my resolution for this year. If some bloke ask "why aren't your resolution like make you closer to God one?" Then let me tell you that God's relationship with me is very intimate, what He has for me, I cannot anyhow tell otherwise you might be implicated and I don't know what will happen. Furthermore, usually what He has for me is usually commands and not invitations, so you realise the severity of the situation? Kekeke...

Looking at my blog there are loads of things I have yet to update...perhaps I'll shower it with photos first. Ya, I'll just do that. Cheerios...this is a whole new year of fresh beginnings.