Wednesday, May 25

A familiar nostalgia (T__________T) _

thought I should put this in entry in my blog as honesty should be of priority. Cecilia and I never did have a proper closure. Not sure how it ended also, it is just like that, "a very silent departing" as if we know why we are leaving each other for. Many of times when I am sitted alone in my room or seeking solitude in any place thinking bout God and stuff, I must admit that a certain share of my thoughts still belong to her. She is very caring and loving, at times selfless towards me. Her white musk fragrance still lingers after so long.

it was time to let go, no more pondering on thoughts that bring about tears and questions that was left unanswered.

thing is that I can't believe I saw her with someone else in such short time. three years of built relationship can shatter and be mended in just a month with someone else? irony of love...mundane love. that is it, it just stunned me. I am sorry to cecilia, perhaps the main protagonist in our life is the person we believe we love very much, but the fact is we struggled to love Him being together. i just turned away in shock when i saw them at HMV like two weeks ago, i was like, wow! a tad happy for her also. whatever!

The feelings and frustrations is of emptiness now, a void that yearns to be filled. Void that is made of flesh. But God made known that void is a shape of Him. I need to fill it now! Enlarge my capacity of you oh Lord.

"One Last Cry" My shattered dreams and broken heart Are mending on the shelf I saw you holding hands Standing close to someone else Now I sit all alone Wishing all my feelings was gone I gave my best to you Nothing for me to do But have one last cry

[Chorus:]One last cry Before I leave it all behind I gotta put you out of my mind this time Stop living a lie I guess I'm down to my last cryCry.....I was here You were there Guess we never could agree While the sun shines on you I need some love to rain on me Still I sit all alone Wishing all my feelings was gone Gotta get over you Nothing for me to do But have one last cry

[Chorus:]One last cry Before I leave it all behind I goota put you out of my mind For the very last time Been living a lie I guess I'm down, I guess I'm down I guess I'm down...I guess I'm down...To my last cry...

new chapter in life...God writtened


xodus said...

Hey brother, sorry to hear about this through your blog. Well, love hurts at times but be prepared for a chapter in your life!
Anin't doing so good myself love wise troubled by the uncertainty of it all.
God is love so yeah love God first i guess and love will find it's way! Missing you guys and wished i could be there in indonesia with you guys! Seeing you guys in the pictures you posted really makes my day. Looking forward to come home, Singapore, where I belong!

Pearly said...

hey dear guys
you know what? i just got out of a 3 yr relationship myself and seriously it's not easy. but the best part of it all is that i learnt that dating isnt part of God's plan! that's why we are having so much heartache. wanna find out more? look for these books..."choosing God's best" & "i kissed dating goodbye"

xodus said...

Cool Pearly, will go get them soon. Feeling so jaded...

anyway are you Pearly Chan?

Pearly said...

yes deary louis!